Kevin's Dead Cat

After surgery sliced off an entire tumor and 1/3 of my tongue, plus six weeks of radiation therapy, I've been re-learning how to eat, drink, and talk with my newly re-constructed tongue and coping with side effects. But the cancer came back and I don't know what's going to happen next.

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Location: Los Angeles, California, United States

I don't want life to imitate art. I want life to be art.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Hallunications and Caring for my Trache Tube

At around 3am last night I woke up for no good reason, but it felt like I woke up in the middle of something. I just sat up looking around the apartment looking for objects and people. James woke up and asked if I was okay. I said something like, "Where did everybody go?" A complete 180 from the night I asked him if we should start kicking people out (again, there was no one in the apartment but us).

Let's back up a little. Yesterday, I told Nurse Marilou that I've been waking up in the middle of the night with no major discomfort. Just waking up. She suggested I start taking something for mild anxiety, which I already have in my magic bag. I've also been instructd to take the time-release morphine pills three times a day from now on instead of two. And who know what the new Chinese herbs are doing to me.

So back to last night, not a creature was stirring, but James noticed that the inner cannula of my Trache Tube was gone. I walked to the bathroom to check if at some point of the evening I cleaned it out, but forgot to re-insert it. Eventually, we found it sitting on the table next to my bed, uncleaned, and wrapped in tissues. I don't remember ever taking it out.

So as I cleaned out the cannula, James and I tried to figure out when I could've taken it out of my throat without him noticing. I faintly recall a bunch of supernatural creatures were trying to build some magic idol that would ease my pain for the rest of the treatments, but I don't remember giving my contribution.

My Mr. Spock Teddy Bear, Joaquin the Lamb, and Duckie just sat quietly and looked innocent. But I have a feeling they know something.

I didn't tell Dr. McNicoll about it this morning at our follow-up. But he was very pleased with how well I've been caring for the tracheostomy gear. He gave me a more light weight set-up. He also commented that I'm doing a great job keeping my tongue and mouth clean since more dead tissue has been detaching from the tumor. My tongue is actually looking the healthiest it has in a long while.


Blogger Angel said...

Hallucinations huh? I'm not too far behind ya on that one, though mine is from lack of sleep not drug induced.
Glad to here things are looking better. Spoke to Cuz Amado and he's more than happy to help with the loft. Love ya!
yer bro.

June 02, 2005 10:20 AM  
Blogger clowny said...

JTL came by for a visit yesterday. Says he wants to build, and has a bunch of cool tools. I'm serious about turning this into a loft raising event.

As soon as we get the plans, and set a date, anyone interested in free food, hammering, sawing, and all that construction stuff should e-mail their interest availability, hunger and thirst quenching requirements. It will be soo much fun!

June 02, 2005 6:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Count me in for sure!
John L

June 06, 2005 11:17 AM  

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